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To make you laugh!

June 10, 2009

“The Bible tells us to love our neighbours, and also to love our enemies; probably because, generally speaking, they are the same people.”

          G. K. Chesterton


“When they circumcized Herbert Samuel, they threw away the wrong bit.”

          Lloyd George


“Americans have different ways of saying things. They say “Elevator”; we say “Lift”;

they say “President”, we say “stupid psychopathic git”.

          Alexei Sayle (not referring to the present President of course!)


“Being powerful is like being a lady: if you have to tell people you are, you aren’t.”

          Margaret Thatcher


“It was very good of God to let Carlyle and Mrs Carlyle marry one another and so make only two people miserable instead of four.”

          Samuel Johnson


“She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say “When”

          P. G. Wodehouse.


“Now my aunt has a conscience that’s absentee for about eleven months of the year, and only turns up at Lent to annoy her husband’s people, who are considerably lower than the angels, so to speak.”

          Saki (H. H. Munro)

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